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IT NEVER ENDS. Seiously what is this a month long binge? I remembered that my sister is coming over tomorrow and she is bringing cake so i was like so whats the point in being good today. WHY DID I THINK THAT BECAUSE I FEEL SO SHIT NOW!

We he wasnt having no for an answer today, i got a cupcake and some chocolate. There i go again stuffing my face with every food i can see. I was even binging on food i dont even like. I am blaming this on my period. It must be coming, i'm a week late and i am craving food like a pig!

I can seriously feel the extra fat on me, i want to purge so much. I failed and gave in so i have to start all over again.

OMG. This friend of mine started talking about self harm today. It was so awkward. I was just saying you shouldn't judge people that do that because you never know whats going on in their lives. Then he said, well it must be bad if you want everyone to think your a freak. Thanks, what a great friend he is. I am never going to tell him anything. He would hate me forever.

Tomorrow is the beginning of my summer holidays. So that means i am offically on the diet of loosing 20 something pounds before the end of august? Yes it is. So i need to be strong. Going to start distracting myself. Oh yeah i broke my elastic band, i snapped it too hard.

I need to take this diet with force, no weak links. From tomorrow, NO CHOCOLATE, NO PEANUTS, NO BINGING, NO PURGING, NO CUTTING. I think it's a fair deal. Wish me luck.

Bekah
xxx

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