Yeah i failed. EPICLY. My friend sucks. She forced me to have dinner and many other foods. But really i screwed up as soon as i woke up. I have cake for breakfast. Then i cut, deeper than ever before. I also cut on my wrist for the first time....why am i such a fuck up? So i ate, and ate and ate today. But i did exerice, my net is 433. But my intake is 1215. Meh, i suck.
So my cuts hurt, they wouln't stop bleeding. I am so disapoined in my self. The same with the binging.
Maybe i should stop saying that tomorrow i will be better, becuase am i ever really? I am with the mother tomorrow so that makes things difficult, to restrict but i think i will go to the gym for an hour! Burn some of my digusting fat off!
Limit tomorrow? 500 i think. That seems so much, feel like i fail if i eat 500, maybe 300? That sounds so much better. I had 300 calories today. You know what also sounds a lot better. I weigh 95lbs. I need to implant my UGW in my head when i want to binge. Think about all the things i hate about my self. stupid/ugly/fat/wobbly/lumpy/giant/idiot/pathetic/worthless/depressed.
I cry in my pillow tonight, for a better tomorrow.
Bekah
xxx
So my cuts hurt, they wouln't stop bleeding. I am so disapoined in my self. The same with the binging.
Maybe i should stop saying that tomorrow i will be better, becuase am i ever really? I am with the mother tomorrow so that makes things difficult, to restrict but i think i will go to the gym for an hour! Burn some of my digusting fat off!
Limit tomorrow? 500 i think. That seems so much, feel like i fail if i eat 500, maybe 300? That sounds so much better. I had 300 calories today. You know what also sounds a lot better. I weigh 95lbs. I need to implant my UGW in my head when i want to binge. Think about all the things i hate about my self. stupid/ugly/fat/wobbly/lumpy/giant/idiot/pathetic/worthless/depressed.
I cry in my pillow tonight, for a better tomorrow.
xxx
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